None of us poets know quite
what to write, although many do
thoughtfully, yet it’s never quite
right, not really… apart from the
risk of labels such as virtue
signalling
Words in a time of war carry weight
and most of our words don’t weigh
quite enough in the face of Gaza
poetry isn’t going to cut the mustard
somehow, no matter how heartfelt
somehow
I’m on Insta and scroll for comfort
I find Ruhama, from Boston,
Mother of four, Middle Eastern Cook
she’s Jewish and lately, I hesitate
to tick like and instead I push ‘save’
secretly
She’s not responsible for Gaza any more
than I am, or you are. For a while I did
watch the reports on Insta from
Middleeasteye, but frequently now
there’s a ‘sensitive content’
warning
I have no problem watching videos where
planes have dropped thousands of feet
startling passengers, tossing them around
bloodied crew and oxygen masks amok
in fact I’m deeply engrossed in their drama
vicarious
I want to look, to force myself to witness
what’s happening, not to be a wimp
not put my head in the sand become an
Ostrich scroller only looking for food content
or a comedy diversion from Tom Sainsbury
selective
But I want to look away, avert my eyes
rather than watching mothers wailing
their babies bodies dismembered, burned
buried, bombed, brutalised, babies
we’re talking about babies
babies
The words of poets seem, well, less
than adequate, no matter how adequate
their form, intent and language, because
how can a poem adequately, accurately
begin to convey
what
is
happening
today
in
Gaza
a curious half hour 
You frame it so well Maggie. It’s the same for me. At first I was horrified with the assault on the Jewish people at the festival, many deaths, many dreadful assaults on women and the kidnapping. The Jewish blood in me was on fire. But then Netanyahu began the bombing of Gaza. It got worse and worse. I was conflicted, until I wasn’t. There was a point when I couldn’t look any more. Just as you say here, babies, babies, babies, so deliberate, targeting women & babies and maternity wings. And then someone said that Netanyahu has forever destroyed all we are supposed to remember about the holocaust. I can’t look anymore. I don’t know where to look.
And then I read this by Danny Mulhern:
What do Jew’s have against antisemitism anyway?
The ghastly tragedy of Gaza and Israel plays out like a history book you have read before. Israeli and Palestinian propagandists fighting for the high moral ground while occupying the gutter. A few Jewish voices stick to facts, Gideon Levi from Haaretz who must be the most hated man in Israel for focusing on human truths beyond childish concepts of justice and revenge. He focuses on the names of those who have died, they are hairdressers, kids who ate spaghetti, students of zoology, Not Arabs, Gazans Jews or Israelis, Neighbours, human beings who I can choose to empathise with. My family were victims of the Holocaust. I have my great Aunt Hennrietta’s table that was made for her in beautiful inlaid wood, her Initials expertly inset in the center, Her last postcard was from from Gurs, where she was murdered after escaping to democratic France, only to be rounded up by the Malice and deported to her death. The post card is packed with tiny words, filling the centre and round the edges with pleas for help. She knew it was the last thing she would ever write. Terrible. My Mother Soni, whose immediate family escaped to the dull peace of New Zealand in the 1940’s, understood the hate behind their expulsion, Nationalism, Patriotic displays, the soldiers’ simplistic pride in soil and blood. Religious, ideological, zealotry and dogma, Words that sum up Netanyahu’s Israel, and the Hamas of Gaza. Both elected by the people and possibly still popular. My God. Netanyahu has ruined the Holocaust for everyone. WIth the help of a compliant shrieking left who wish to minimise the Shoah by replacing a generations understanding of a Genocide to mean not who killed Jews, but who Jews killed.
I sat down with H.. who genuinely couldn’t understand who could support Israel, he had never met anyone who did, so that seemed to be the reason he didn’t. It is a deeply unfashionable view to stand up for Jews who feel they are allowed to be home anywhere but home. S.W another intellectual wondered why Jews needed one, why can’t Jew’s settle where they are contributing intellectual and artistic heft to the cultures that permitted them to live there. He thinks Jews are all Albert Einstein, “Forget about Einstein, what about Abel Cohen from next door”. They ask me about my views?, I tell them when I am with pro Israeli’s I oppose Israel, and when I am with pro Palestinians I oppose them.
I despise loyalty oaths, I will not wave flags, I attended a hostage vigil only to find myself amongst an occasion that was organised or hijacked by an extreme right fundamentalist Christian cult called Destiny Church. A few Jewish people attended but by far the majority were completely unaware of any issues about Israel apart from Biblical ones. Which are perhaps the least relevant of any reasons. Many people have resided in that region. Jews have a strong link but not the only one. One Jewish couple I spoke to said it didn’t matter who supported “Israel”, at least they were there. But my guts tell me something else, I fled
I am not going to march for Palestine for the same heuristic reasons that I feel that It is supporting Hamas and giving succour to Nazi rapists and murderers. I see the Greens and even Te Pati Maori claiming solidarity, my stomach sinks, it is too easy to choose a side that suits you. I saw a Green leader on a stage, roaring about that pointless swathe of desert, all I could see was that they were enjoying themselves. One commentator said, “ When the Left turns against Jews, there is no Left.”
Yuvol Noah Hariri put it best.” If you have to choose between justice or peace, choose peace.” Justice means eternal War. Peace means getting on with life despite injustice. I know what one I want. What it means now is that someone has to stop the fighting and the killing. That someone is Israel. The idea and optimism of Israel has already been defeated; what’s left are only the cemeteries glorifying victory.
And as for the left, It must be a relief to vilify Jews again without guilt. So now we must distinguish between good Jews and bad Jews, Zionists or Others. The difference is irrelevant to the young german girl raped and murdered on October 7th and then dragged through the streets of Gaza while onlookers spat on her corpse
As a Jew and someone who considered themselves left wing I embody contradiction as does anyone who is human. Perhaps I suffer from what a friend from Israel told me, an addiction to the religious ecstasy of joyous loathing. a holy hatred. When every part of my body screams for revenge and truth, how can it be possible for me to doubt my own raison d’etre. But the thing I hate about my enemy the most, is the suspicion that they may have a point, or even worse, they may like eating hummus as much as I do.
I hate being pointed to uncomfortable facts. How dare anyone ruin the party. It’s my genocide and I’ll cry if I want too. Doubt is the most progressive thought of all, certainties lead to catastrophe. There is no solution, the only solution is getting on with life without a solution. Living with painful contradictions no matter how difficult, is the only possible answer. Other solutions tend to end with finality.
שלום לישראל
Shalom Israel Christine XO
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Thank you so much, Christine for such a thoughtful response and posting Danny Mulhern’s piece which I had not read before.
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So honest, so strong. You’re is a voice I want to hear. And like Christine I am an adamant non -supporter of either force. If only anyone in the world had a solution for this relentless disaster. (Remember Trump’s son-in-law Jared Wotsisname, sent there to do what nobody else has been able to do?)
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Thanks, Rachel. I am a supporter of Palestine for Statehood. Whether that is a two state solution or however it can be achieved. But I have no time for Hamas or the IDF right now.
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This was so beautifully written, and a truth that so many of us feel. How mundane (specious?) to go scrolling for glossy recipe ideas when there is so much suffering and desperation for the world’s help between each bright artful photo on the gram. I am not alone in this feeling, but still, I continue to scroll.
Thank you Maggie for your words.
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Thanks, Jess for stopping to comment and reading my blog.
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